Facing Infertility, A Complicated Opponent

For some people, dealing with infertility can be a source of great frustration. For those who dream of becoming a parent this obstacle constitutes, at least in principle, a real tragedy. The impossibility of making one’s dream come true can affect the individual in a very profound way. Yet, as now happens in any other reality that concerns the human being, there is always a solution.

The infertility is an increasingly common problem. It is estimated that on average one in six couples have this problem. It is generally a real surprise to discover that you cannot have children. We all start from the premise of being able to procreate, until an examination convinces us to the contrary. For this reason, infertility is a difficult problem to accept. However, there are remedies to better deal with this news.

The example of friends on how to deal with infertility

As with other topics, sterility is also often the subject of an exchange of views. Perhaps you also know someone who, not being able to have children with their partner, has decided to leave him to find one able to fulfill his parental wish. Couples who are diagnosed with infertility often fall into the trap of blaming the infertile partner rather than exploring the possibilities offered by scientific research.

One of the misconceptions about infertility is that anxiety about wanting a child is the cause of the problem. Those who believe it blame those who worry too much. Rather than being helpful, this attitude only generates unnecessary and excessive feelings of guilt.

That stress can affect fertility is true, but cases where it is the determining factor for the development of this disorder are so rare that it cannot be held responsible. The only time this belief is really worth crediting is when a doctor advocates it.

A relationship problem

One of the most immediate consequences of a diagnosis of infertility is the establishment of a state of asymmetry within the couple. Typically, it is only one of the two who cannot have children. Still, it’s a problem that inevitably falls on both partners. It is a real test of fire for the stability of a relationship.

Those with fertility problems are likely to feel guilty and responsible for their partner’s frustration. The latter, in turn, will face a very important dilemma: if he wishes to have children naturally, he will be forced to change mate. If, on the other hand, he does not want to break the relationship, he will have to give up the possibility of having children naturally.

It is not easy for either of us, but it is not good to try to find a solution to the problem individually. Both partners need to work through the situation, but the advice is to do it openly and frankly. On the contrary, not externalizing one’s state of mind leads to misunderstandings and conflicts that only risk further burdening the situation.

It is important to dedicate the right time and space to the topic. It makes no sense to think about it all the time and talk about it all the time. One tip is to start a project together that can be completed. This goal can keep communication open, as well as keeping alive a goal to be achieved together.

The different alternatives to deal with infertility

By the time you discover that you are sterile, the possibilities for assisted reproduction are often exhausted. This means that both partners most likely already bear some signs of emotional wear in the face of this news. There will certainly be someone better prepared to deal with it, but rarely is a diagnosis of this kind not shaken.

The problem does not have an immediate solution, but it deserves time and rest to better explore all the possibilities. You know, considering the problem is different from facing it when it really arises. It is best not to put pressure on either your partner or yourself about what to do.

Find out about the alternatives available, both those that offer biological solutions for the fertile partner and those that involve adoption. Unfortunately, however, the option to end the relationship is always one of the most popular. If you feel too much tension, too much conflict or too much anxiety within the couple, seek help from a therapist first.

Being a parent is more than just a biological matter. The wonder of having a child consists not only in what happens to the body, but above all in the fabulous transformation that takes place on the mind and heart.