5 Characteristics Of Emotionally Immature People

There are many myths about the concepts of maturity and immaturity. People do not agree to occupy a single box or receive a single label. Each of us is a vessel that holds different forms of consciousness. We are ignorant and wise, children and the elderly, childish and conscientious. All at the same time, even if, depending on the circumstance, some features stand out more.

Emotional immaturity could be defined as a condition in which people who have not given up on childhood wishes or fantasies find themselves. Desires and fantasies that have to do with the fact that the world revolves around them, that reality bends to their wishes. Similarly, emotional maturity could be defined as a condition of strength and temperament that leads to realistic and balanced implementations.

More than with abstract definitions, immaturity and maturity are perceived through certain behaviors. Below we will list the five characteristics typical of emotionally immature people.

1. Emotionally immature people are self-centered

Much of the process of our maturation consists in understanding that the world does not revolve around us. The newborn does not know, so he asks to eat at 2 am and does not worry if this disturbs the parents’ rest. As the child grows, he understands that he does not always get everything he wants and that other people, with their needs, live in the world.

To mature means to come out of the prison of the ego. It means losing the illusion of life that we have as babies and children, that is to say that it is enough to ask for our need or desire to be satisfied. When we begin to give up on this fantasy, we become aware of a beautiful possibility : the adventure of exploring the universe of others. Hopefully, we learn to preserve the ego and reach the you.

2. They have a hard time making commitments

An unmistakable sign of emotional immaturity is the difficulty of making commitments. The child struggles to give up what he wants at a given moment in order to achieve a long-term goal. If we give him a candy promising him another if he does not eat it, the desire to eat the one he has in his hand will prevail.

As we mature, we understand that sacrifices and restrictions are necessary to achieve goals. And that engaging in something or with a person is not a limit to freedom, but a condition to project oneself better and in the long term.

3. They tend to blame others

Children perceive themselves as individuals directed by others, that is, they do not act voluntarily. In general they are, as long as they are in the process of formation and insertion into the culture to which they belong. When you are young, you believe that error leads to guilt. It is not so much the damage done, but the chastisement or punishment that others can give us.

Growing up means getting out of that state of sweet irresponsibility. Maturing means understanding that we are solely responsible for what we do or stop doing. It means learning to recognize our mistakes and learn a lesson from them. It means knowing how to apologize.

4. They establish bonds of dependence

For immature people, others are a means and not an end in themselves. So, since they are a medium, according to their point of view, they need it. They don’t need others because they love them, but because they need them. This is why they usually build highly addictive bonds.

In order to establish bonds based on freedom, there is a need for autonomy. However, immature people are not clear on the concept of autonomy. Sometimes they think that satisfying their will is an autonomous behavior. But when it comes to taking responsibility for their actions, they need others to cushion, hide or lighten their responsibility.

5. They are irresponsible in managing money

Impulsiveness is one of the most obvious characteristics of immature people. An impulsiveness that is often expressed in the way of managing resources, such as money. Wanting to satisfy their desires right away, immature people have no problem buying what they don’t need with the money they don’t have.

Sometimes they embark on absurd financial adventures. They do not objectively evaluate investments and struggle to make medium and long-term projections. For this reason, immature people are often in debt, all to satisfy their whims.

These traits of immaturity do not arise or are preserved by conscious choice. They are almost always a consequence of an emotional emptiness of childhood. They can also be the result of unfortunate experiences that have prevented these people from growing. If you are like this too or you know someone with these characteristics, you must not report it. In reality, the important thing is to understand that giving a boost to the growth process can really guarantee a better life.

Main image courtesy of Catrin Welz-Stein